ZombieMall.com Blog

In a world overrun by zombies, how would you do?

Chances are, if you are reading this, you probably think your chances are pretty good.

Yep, you have taken the “Can you survive the Zombie Apocalypse?” test on Facebook – multiple times, until you have obtained the perfect score.

Yeah, you are ex-military and can kill a zombie with a mere twist of your little finger.

Yes, yes, you have a good stockpile of weapons, knives, guns, swords, etc, so you are good to go.

You have your zombie preparedness kit fully stocked, you have your MRE’s all packed, you even have your pellets to purify water stored in a water tight container.

Yep, you may think you are prepared.  But for 45% of us, we are not.

Wait what?  45%?  That’s almost half the population!

Yeah.  That’s actually a pretty drastic number.

What the hell are you talking about?

I’m talking about your body betraying you.

My body betray me?  How’s that?

Okay, let me be blunt.

Do you snore?

Yeah, that’s a tough one.  Not many survival experts have stopped to think about that one.

Imagine you have survived the initial onslaught, and go to sleep one night only to fill the surrounding area with deep, loud, saw-log-cutting snores.  When that throng of Walking Dead comes roaming by, guess what…  You are gonna wake up to being a snack.

This really open up a new world of dilemmas.  Of course your fortification is going to be the biggest preventative step here.  I mean, if you decide to go nomad, going from place to place, you may find yourself having to camp out one night.  Do you really want just a thin mesh of tent screen between you and the chomps of death when you start to snore?

On the other hand, if you are deep within a bunker with solid concrete walls, chances are you’ll be okay.  Maybe.

So what can you do?

Making your fortification soundproof seems to be a good idea.. at first.  However, by soundproofing your living area, not only are you preventing the noise you make from getting out, you are also preventing any noise from the outside from getting in, thus preventing you from getting any possible warning that the undead are close by.

Setting up a living and sleeping area up a ladder or in a secure location out of reach (as seen in the original Dawn of the Dead) also seems like a good idea, again.. at first.  Your snore will still attract them, but they won’t be able to get to you, but then you are trapped and eventually will run out of ammo, food, and supplies (again as seen in the original Dawn of the Dead).  And chances are, you won’t have access to a helicopter.

I DO snore and you are not giving me much hope, so what can I do?

Of the 45% of people who snore, 90% of them are overweight.  They have fat buildup around their necks that more or less collapses, causing the snore to happen.  There are many other reasons that can cause a person to snore, but look at yourself in the mirror.  Are you overweight?  Could you stand to lose a few pounds?  There is a good chance that by doing so will reduce your body’s tendency to saw those logs when you sleep (not to mention it’s just good common sense to get in shape before the zombie outbreak happens).  What’s the Number One rule of ZombieLand ?  Yep!  Cardio.  It’s the fatties that got eaten first.

So there are multiple reasons to shed some weight.  Get yourself fir now, lose that extra Big Mac or Whopper, shed a few pounds, and you may find that the deep rumbling snore has diminished.

Don’t let your body betray you.  Instead hone it like a sharp tool and let it help you survive.

Playing in the leaves is something all children do; twins Steven and K.C are no different. One autumn evening the five year olds ask to go out and play until dinner is ready. What happens that night will haunt Steven for the next twenty years. Now with a daughter of his own, Steven is left to struggle with the painful, guilt ridden choice of keeping his daughter safe or help the brother he lost, long ago, the one person Steven always thought he would do anything to have back.

Excerpt from the book:

“K.C., I wanna go,” Steven turned towards K.C. to try to convince his brother to stop with the idea of being buried, when he saw something that made him stop talking mid-sentence and halt his footsteps. Where K.C. was lying on the ground, the leaves began to swirl in a large spiral. They lifted into the air, picking up in speed and quantity. The buzzing noise became louder, the high pitch was starting to hurt Steven’s ears. He watched spell bound as the vegetation lifted higher and higher, forming what looked like a tornado made of leaves to the five year old. The dead, autumn foliage that was covering K.C. seemed to come to life at the base of the leafy twister. The swirling mass was spinning so fast, just watching it was making him dizzy. Steven wanted to run but was frozen with fear, unable to move or scream for help.

Then he saw something that would give him nightmares for years to come. The leaves that had been covering K.C. were sucked up into the rapidly spinning leafy tornado, until the ground below was bare. Steven’s eyes were wide with terror. He opened his mouth and screamed but the buzzing was so loud, his voice seemed silent in the night. He stood there releasing scream after scream, watching the tornadic leaves spin faster and faster. His heart was racing, his head was spinning and he was starting to feel sick to his stomach. Yet Steven was oblivious to what his body was trying to tell him—to warn him. His focus was on one thing and one thing only, the ground below the twister was empty. K.C. was gone…vanished…disappeared.

Available now
Hellfire Publishing http://www.hellfirepublishing.com/
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You can find Savannah Rayne at
http://savannahrayne.blogspot.com/

https://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/pages/Savannah-Rayne-Author/284932264865341

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 I have LOTS of goodies from my friends over at Hellfire Publishing to share with you today.  Just take a look at all of this:

Hellfire Publishing will be featuring four holiday stories for you to enjoy for free this holiday season. Over the next four weeks, a different story will be featured by some very talented writers on the Hellfire Herald.

http://hellfireherald.blogspot.com/ 
Here’s what’s in store for your reading pleasure 

November 28^th thru December 3^rd … Zombies for Christmas, the prequel to Summit the Zombie Hunter series, by Keira Kroft 

December 5^th thru 10^th …Silver Bells and Zombie Tales, by Robin Renee Ray 

December 12^th thru 17^th … Bloody Christmas, the prequel to Superstition Mountain, By Stacy Thompson- Geer 

December 19^th thru 24^th … Santa’s Claws, by Tim Heffernan

Inspired by H.P. Lovecraft comes a book of unspeakable terror.  Okay, maybe not unspeakable, but it will be full of horror and monsters.  Edited by Kevin Lucia, illustrated by Danny Evarts, The Terror at Miskatonic Falls features over 50 contributors (of which I am one of) who slowly reveal what happened one fateful winter in that quiet little town.

In a historic battle Zombies vs Vampires, it seems that Zombies win.  ZombieMall.com has absorbed all of the inventory of VampireMall.com.  We also are running their website, currently it is pointing back to ZombieMall.com.

Among the more interesting items is the all hand made wooden Vampire Stakes.  You gotta check these out! (just click the photo below to check it out in our shop).

“I’ll see you again in 25 years.”

Those words were spoken back in 1990.  Simple math told us back then that we would get a visit from Laura Palmer again in the year 2015.

I’ll leave you with this that I came across…

It has been a while since I have mentioned anything about an artist on here, and the website knows this.  A couple of weeks back I found myself in possession of something outstanding, something haunting, something awe-inspiring.

Artist Bill Killen sent me some zombie prints (signed and numbered!) and I gotta say… These things have blown me away.

Don’t take my word for it, instead let his work speak for itself:

The collection is called The Zombie Hordes and much higher resolution images can be seen on Bill’s site here: The Zombie Hordes

The hardest decision I have to make next is which Jumbo Print I am going to order!

As promised, here is the 1st bit of (inside) news from Hellfire Publishing!

“For Brian, hunting demons was always easy.  Sending them to Hell was the difficult part.  Bringing them back, well, that was just flat out suicide.”

-Excerpt from To Hell and Back

The Demon’s Dozen.  What is it?  Nevermind that for now, we’ll get to that.  First let’s have a little chat over some nice freshly brewed tea.  Mind you though, it’s hot.

Books.  I am never far away from a good read, there is always something within arm’s length.  Oh yes, of course in my library you will find almost every work by Stephen King, quite a few from Clive Barker, Brian Lumley, and H.P. Lovecraft.  But what I really enjoy are the lesser known authors.  That’s not a slight at them in the least, oh no.  I can see where you may consider my term “lesser known” to be derogatory, but I can assure you it is anything but.  No, I simply mean that they are not a household name, well, at least not yet.

Do you need some sugar for your tea?  Yes?  There you go.  Try a sip, it should be cool enough now.

Where were we?  Ahh, yes.. What I really enjoy..  Yes, the lesser known authors.  You know, there is an amazing bunch of authors out there that produce some very vivid and wicked tales.  A lot of that stuff has teeth with which to devour your mind while your eyes devour their very words!  Sadly, many are never given the chance to impress the heavy population of readers!

I hear a storm brewing outside.  Come, let’s sit by the warm fire while we chat and sip of our tea.

Technology is a wonderful thing.  I’m a big fan of physical books myself, but I am finding that there are many reads that simply do not exist in physical book form.  Take this tale I am providing to you now.  You will not find it’s words in any physical form.  It’s exists in pure digital format!  And let me tell you, that digital format is something I am becoming quite fond of!

If I were to hand you my electronic tablet, you would find sitting atop it a link to a most horrific site.  Well, okay, I admit, it’s not horrific in the sense that images will cause your brain to melt due to their gruesome nature.  No, not quite like that.  No, this site to which I refer is called Hellfire Publishing.  Hellfire sports all forms of genre writing, most of it being of a darker nature, of course.

Oh, did you see that?  The lights flickered for a moment.  Not to worry, we still have the light of the fire to see each other by.  The tea is good, is it not?  It’s my own special blend.

Why bring this up?  Well, as you know I am all about promoting that “lesser known” horror author, artist, musician, and the like.  It is rare indeed to run across a company such as Hellfire Publishing that will go out of it’s way to also promote it’s authors.  Naturally it was something I had to get involved in.  So what I have done is set up a section here on my site that will be dedicated to all news pertaining to Hellfire Publishing.

To the right on your screen you should see a list of Categories.  The specific one for Hellfire is simply called: HP Demon Dozen.  Any new news, contests, announcements, events, or new releases from Hellfire Publishing will be listed here.  You can also visit their site for that information as well.

Oh my my.  It seems the power has gone out all together.  Here, slide closer to the fire.  Everyone knows that demons detest fire, so no harm will come to you while you are close to it…

What do I get out of this deal?  Ahh yes, you asked me in the beginning what was the Demon’s Dozen.  Okay, I’ve bent your ear for long enough.  The Demon’s Dozen is this; we are made up of 12 individuals dedicated to helping to promote the glorious works that Hellfire Publishing helps to produce.

Okay, I must admit that my motives are personal.  Afterall, are demons not a selfish lot?  Ahh, yes, perhaps I should have mentioned that from the start.  You see, I too am a writer.  I desire and long to spill forth words from my mind for others to devour.  And in that I feel that if I am able to promote those that have impressed me, then one day when it has become my time, they will in return promote me.  I am trying to give before I take.

The fire?  Me a demon?  Yes, I did say that everyone knows demons detest fire.  That was a lure.  Demons are born of fire! Demons are born of HellFire!

******

Click the badge below to go directly to Hellfire Publishing’s site and check out all the books they have to offer.

Rubber is not for everyone. I first found out about it less than a week ago. The idea is simple enough, a tire wakes up in the middle of a desert to discover it has telepathic abilities and can kill using those abilities. Yes, you read that correctly, a tire. From a car. It doesn’t matter which one, front or back, driver side or passenger side. It’s a movie about just a tire. Except it’s not a tire (which it is – for no reason).

Rubber is directed by Quentin Dupieux and what he turns out is a very David Lynch style film; mix in a dash of irony, and a massive heap of things that happen for “no reason” and you have exactly what Rubber is all about.

When I discovered that this film existed, less than a week ago I wish to point out, I went to Netflix and added it to the top of my list. It arrived today and this evening I sat down to watch it…

A little slow in the beginning, actually very slow for the entire duration, but if you are watching it for fast action, you are watching it for the wrong reason. The reason this should be watched is for the storytelling. Everything in movies has been done before. Rubber is no exception, at least as far as the world of inanimate objects coming to life goes. We have an entire car (Christine), a child’s doll (Child’s Play), the list goes on and on. However (and no I’m not going to compare this movie’s story to that of Christine – Stephen King is by far the master, and always will be), what does set this movie apart from other so called horror movies, is the story itself.

There are, in essence, 2 different “universes” going on in Rubber. There are the Spectators and there are the Actors. I don’t want to go into any spoilers as to how everything is pulled off and executed, but suffice it to say this movie will stay with you after you have seen it. I’ll warn you now, it’s artsy. It’s not for everyone. It’s a “thinking person” movie. You have to have an open mind, and be ready to suspend disbelief.

Personally, I enjoyed it and give it 4 stars out of 5.